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Sunday, April 9, 2017
Wednesday, May 11, 2011
Today I took my wedding ring off....
I've known for a while this day was coming. The writing was on the wall.
No, my marriage isn't on the rocks. In a few weeks I will celebrate my 37th wedding anniversary to that cute Canadian boy I married at barely 18.
As I was getting ready for work I decided that my pretty diamond ring had become too loose to wear without risking losing it. I have had a couple close calls. I had moved it to my middle finger some time ago. Recently, I would put it on my pointer finger. Today, after it slipped off, I had to face the music.
My fingers have been shrinking. Officially, as of today I am down 68 pounds, but sill have that much more to lose. When I get to my goal I'll have my rings resized. For now, rather than risk losing my diamond ring, I decided to put it away.
That got me to searching through my jewelry box for a substitute ring to wear on that hand. For kicks, I dug out my simple, original wedding band from my days as a child bride. It wasn't all that long ago I tried it on and could barely get it on my pinkie. I wondered how close I was to being able to actually get it on my ring finger. To my stunned delight, it slipped right on!
An exciting and unexpected milestone! Next, I wondered if there was any chance that my high school class ring, even smaller, could possibly fit. I bought it when I was 16, a very long time ago. I was flabbergasted that it slipped right on, too!
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No, my marriage isn't on the rocks. In a few weeks I will celebrate my 37th wedding anniversary to that cute Canadian boy I married at barely 18.
As I was getting ready for work I decided that my pretty diamond ring had become too loose to wear without risking losing it. I have had a couple close calls. I had moved it to my middle finger some time ago. Recently, I would put it on my pointer finger. Today, after it slipped off, I had to face the music.
My fingers have been shrinking. Officially, as of today I am down 68 pounds, but sill have that much more to lose. When I get to my goal I'll have my rings resized. For now, rather than risk losing my diamond ring, I decided to put it away.
That got me to searching through my jewelry box for a substitute ring to wear on that hand. For kicks, I dug out my simple, original wedding band from my days as a child bride. It wasn't all that long ago I tried it on and could barely get it on my pinkie. I wondered how close I was to being able to actually get it on my ring finger. To my stunned delight, it slipped right on!
An exciting and unexpected milestone! Next, I wondered if there was any chance that my high school class ring, even smaller, could possibly fit. I bought it when I was 16, a very long time ago. I was flabbergasted that it slipped right on, too!
I admit to crying a few emotional tears at that moment. Those rings had not fit my fingers for DECADES! I will have fun wearing them. Every time I look at my hands it makes me smile! There isn't a single thing about them that is special, except that after a very long time, they FIT! Go Vikings! Class of '74 RULES!
Friday, February 18, 2011
California, here I come!
I'm leaving tomorrow for my annual Keller Williams Realty Family Reunion in Anaheim. Having lost 50+ pounds, and having given to charity about 165 items of clothing, my closet is BARE! It's CRAZY how few clothes I have! But, I don't want to buy winter clothes now since they won't fit next winter after I have lost 75+ more pounds... So I am making do with just a few outfits.
But out of necessity I ventured out today to see if I could find a few things to wear in order to look presentable this coming week in California. I am hard to fit. Very short, very wide. Disproportionately large arms. Fitted sleeves don't fit. Hey, but I have a cute face!
So anyway, at my first stop I took two tops into the dressing room. Not only did they both fit well, I LOVED them both! Usually, I end up settling for something I am less than in love with, simply because it fits me right. I ventured to another store, took a couple more tops into the dressing room, and again I scored two tops that fit AND that I loved! Man, I could get used to this!
Pants were a little more challenging, being that my legs are so short and wide, but I did find one pair that I LOVE and that fits WELL! And in a size I haven't worn for many years! Wooohoooo! I even scored a great pair of shoes for hobbling miles and miles on my arthritic knees through the exhibition hall. They are supportive, comfy, stylish and SMALLER! That's right, my shoes are getting too big and I had to buy shoes either a half or full size smaller!
Tomorrow I will head to California with a few new outfits in smaller sizes and will thoroughly enjoy wearing them. My hair, however, will be out of control. Under orders not to cut or color it until my makeover for The Women's Council of Realtors fashion show on April 7th, my ends are split and my roots are showing. It is lifeless, drab and hanging in my eyes. What's a girl to do? I will follow orders and leave it alone.
And I will imagine people walking past me thinking, "Wow, she could actually be attractive for a fat girl if she would just DO SOMETHING with her hair!"
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I am not a shopper. Don't like to shop, never have, never will.
But out of necessity I ventured out today to see if I could find a few things to wear in order to look presentable this coming week in California. I am hard to fit. Very short, very wide. Disproportionately large arms. Fitted sleeves don't fit. Hey, but I have a cute face!
So anyway, at my first stop I took two tops into the dressing room. Not only did they both fit well, I LOVED them both! Usually, I end up settling for something I am less than in love with, simply because it fits me right. I ventured to another store, took a couple more tops into the dressing room, and again I scored two tops that fit AND that I loved! Man, I could get used to this!
Pants were a little more challenging, being that my legs are so short and wide, but I did find one pair that I LOVE and that fits WELL! And in a size I haven't worn for many years! Wooohoooo! I even scored a great pair of shoes for hobbling miles and miles on my arthritic knees through the exhibition hall. They are supportive, comfy, stylish and SMALLER! That's right, my shoes are getting too big and I had to buy shoes either a half or full size smaller!
Tomorrow I will head to California with a few new outfits in smaller sizes and will thoroughly enjoy wearing them. My hair, however, will be out of control. Under orders not to cut or color it until my makeover for The Women's Council of Realtors fashion show on April 7th, my ends are split and my roots are showing. It is lifeless, drab and hanging in my eyes. What's a girl to do? I will follow orders and leave it alone.
And I will imagine people walking past me thinking, "Wow, she could actually be attractive for a fat girl if she would just DO SOMETHING with her hair!"
It's all good! I am a work in progress, and I'm getting better and better every day!
Thursday, February 17, 2011
FIFTY POUNDS and going strong!
A couple weeks ago I finally hit that 50 pound milestone I had been closing in on. The day I anticipated hitting it, Kerri was there at the scale to document the accomplishment. Cate looked nervously on, as the scale announced my... 49.5 pound weight loss!
Right after that weigh-in, I was at Costco for the first time in months. I decided to find a 50 pound bag of rice so I could lift it and actually feel how much weight I have shed. It was mind blowing! I decided to buy that 50 pound bag of rice, and it was a real struggle trying to hoist it into my cart. A nice man lunged to my rescue and saved me from falling into the aisle under that enormous and heavy bag. He helped me get it into the cart, as I happily told him that I had just lost 50 pounds - as much as that bag weighed. He congratulated me and even shook my hand. He seemed truly impressed. I guess it is impressive, isn't it!
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As I stared at the scale, I couldn't help but smiling anyway! Couldn't say I had lost 50 pounds when I had only lost 49.5 pounds. I took off my rings and earrings and tried again. 49.5, again. But you know what, 49.5 pounds/50 pounds - close enough! It was an AMAZING FEELING!
I'm not sure on what day I actually hit the 50 pound milestone. And it doesn't really matter, does it. It has been slow going the past few weeks. Must be the dreaded plateau, because in spite of my best efforts, that scale just doesn't move much at all. But it's still going down, just not fast enough for me!
Right after that weigh-in, I was at Costco for the first time in months. I decided to find a 50 pound bag of rice so I could lift it and actually feel how much weight I have shed. It was mind blowing! I decided to buy that 50 pound bag of rice, and it was a real struggle trying to hoist it into my cart. A nice man lunged to my rescue and saved me from falling into the aisle under that enormous and heavy bag. He helped me get it into the cart, as I happily told him that I had just lost 50 pounds - as much as that bag weighed. He congratulated me and even shook my hand. He seemed truly impressed. I guess it is impressive, isn't it!The 50 pounds of rice has been sitting on my kitchen counter since I bought it a couple weeks ago. I'm not really sure what to do with it! Last night I had Derek take my picture with it. I could barely hold it!
You can't really see it in the pictures, but I was about to drop that bag while Derek fooled around with the settings on the camera. I can easily imagine my knees and feet thanking me everyday for not having to carry that 50 pounds around anymore!
Here's to the NEXT 50 pounds! And if you are running low on rice, you know where to find some!
Thursday, January 27, 2011
Keep on keepin' on
The past few weeks have been a bit discouraging for me as progress slowed. I transitioned to regular food, and with that experience came the need to plan, shop, cook, prepare, package, count calories, carbs and protein. It takes TIME and DISCIPLINE, things that are not naturally strengths of mine! Although I have joyfully continued to lose, I have put up puny numbers on the scale the past few weekly weign-ins. A one pound loss, and then a 1.5 pound loss. Very discouraging. I do recognize that it is still positive, and happily have never NOT lost at least a little bit, but I'm impatient!
This week I rejoiced with my sister, Kerri, when she reached a particular weight loss milestone she had been aiming for. She is an inspiration to me as we travel this parallel journey to health and fitness. CONGRATULATIONS Kerri! The first milestone of mine that I managed to accomplish was getting off the 35 pounds I had gained over the past year and a half. Once those pounds were gone I was back to where I started and making REAL progress! It was a day of joy and exhilaration when the scale announced my accomplishment! The next milestone, that seems to be so slow in coming, is to get 50 pounds off. I shoulda, coulda, woulda hit it a few weeks ago if I had continued on the path I was on, dropping an average of 3.5 pounds a week. My last three weigh-ins had me down 42 pounds. Then 43 pounds. Then 44.5. COME ON!
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| Back in the saddle again! |
In my determination to hit that 50 pound milestone sooner, rather than later, I am going back to the strict Optifit food for a while. The fact is that I actually grew to LIKE it, and I really MISS the convenience. I don't want to have to think so much about what I am going to eat! Slipping those packets into my neon lunch bag every day, hitting the road and not giving food another thought, is the best meal plan for success, for me. When I'm hungry, pull something out and eat it. When my bag's empty, I'm done for the day. Idiot proof! So today, I am back in the Optifit food saddle. Giddy up!
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| With Peggy and Heidi at the Keller Williams Open House |
Last week my Keller Williams Realty office held a big celebration. Our annual Vision Breakfast celebrating accomplishments of 2011 and goals for the coming year, and later that day, the Grand Opening of our new office. There were several agents attending from Spokane, who I met last Summer during our 8 week BOLD coaching sessions. They wouldn't have known that I have been dieting. Several of them approached me to tell me how good I looked! It was very gratifying because honestly, when I look in the mirror I don't see much difference. But I will keep on keepin' on until I achieve my goals, because there is just no reason not to!
Saturday, January 15, 2011
A modeling makeover, and another AMAZING stroke of good fortune!
It all started last June. I participated in a 8 week coaching program that pushed us to think boldly and create positive energy. Among other things. From there, I boldly decided to audition for the Biggest Loser. My sister, Kerri, and I made it to the final cut before being rejected by the network execs in the last step. We like to think it's because we are too well adjusted to provide prime time drama! Kerri mentioned our experience in her weekly Main Street newspaper column.
The staff at Surgical Bariatrics Northwest read her column and very generously gave us an amazing consolation prize - twelve weeks all expenses paid in their medically supervised Optifit non-surgical weight loss program. It was an amazing three months of hard work and self-discovery. I succeeded in losing 42 pounds!
I still have A LOT to lose, but I am well on my way thanks to the wonderful head start I believe I attracted to myself by boldly taking positive action and working hard to maintain a positive mindset.
After about two months on the program, Marie, the Operating Principal at my real estate office, asked me if I would agree to be a model in the Women's Council of Realtors spring fashion show in April. She thought that since I am working on physically transforming, it might be a good venue for me to show off my progress. I laughed out loud. Seriously? I am short and fat. I have a touch or arthritis in my knees and a bunion on my foot - I wobble when I walk! Not exactly the profile of a fashion model! But then I thought, boldly and positively, that it would be good motivation to stay the course with my fitness goals, so I agreed.
A few weeks later, I came to find out that it is so much more than a fashion show. I had no idea! The dozen or so models spend three months working with a certified fashion consultant. Think of What Not To Wear, Clinton and Stacy! We will have a facial & make-up makeover, a hair makeover, a session with Linda in our closets going through our clothes. Learn colors, styles, accessories, all correct for our different body types. She will shop with us for our show outfits and even make sure we are fitted correctly for new bras! Geeze Louise!
I feel like I did when Kerri and I were gifted with the Optifit program - like I have won a certain kind of lottery! I found out at today's "class" that I need to wear my tops higher to make my short legs look longer. I actually started to hyperventilate when she hiked up my top to demonstrate to the others. I have spent decades under the delusion that longer tops helped camouflage my out-of-proportion, pear-shaped bottom half. It's going to take some mental readjustment. The class unanimously agreed with her that I looked taller and thinner with a shorter top, or I wouldn't believe it. I also learned that I'm not 5'4", I'm 5'2.5". And that I can't touch my hair - cut or color - between now and my makeover, 2+ months from now! Which means a couple months of bad hair days, with gray sideburns and a skunk stripe down the top of my head. Uh oh.
I might not have snagged a spot on The Biggest Loser, but I certainly feel like a winner! I'm a little nervous, but mostly excited, and very grateful for the amazing opportunity to be worked over by a pro.
P.S. Just this past week, Patricia in my office took me aside and said she noticed that I am walking so much better. Not so wobbly. Forty-two pounds off of my arthritic knees and gimpy foot have made a huge difference! I should be able to get another 40 pounds off by April and sashay down that runway with a spring in my step! ◦
The staff at Surgical Bariatrics Northwest read her column and very generously gave us an amazing consolation prize - twelve weeks all expenses paid in their medically supervised Optifit non-surgical weight loss program. It was an amazing three months of hard work and self-discovery. I succeeded in losing 42 pounds!
I still have A LOT to lose, but I am well on my way thanks to the wonderful head start I believe I attracted to myself by boldly taking positive action and working hard to maintain a positive mindset.
After about two months on the program, Marie, the Operating Principal at my real estate office, asked me if I would agree to be a model in the Women's Council of Realtors spring fashion show in April. She thought that since I am working on physically transforming, it might be a good venue for me to show off my progress. I laughed out loud. Seriously? I am short and fat. I have a touch or arthritis in my knees and a bunion on my foot - I wobble when I walk! Not exactly the profile of a fashion model! But then I thought, boldly and positively, that it would be good motivation to stay the course with my fitness goals, so I agreed.
A few weeks later, I came to find out that it is so much more than a fashion show. I had no idea! The dozen or so models spend three months working with a certified fashion consultant. Think of What Not To Wear, Clinton and Stacy! We will have a facial & make-up makeover, a hair makeover, a session with Linda in our closets going through our clothes. Learn colors, styles, accessories, all correct for our different body types. She will shop with us for our show outfits and even make sure we are fitted correctly for new bras! Geeze Louise!
I feel like I did when Kerri and I were gifted with the Optifit program - like I have won a certain kind of lottery! I found out at today's "class" that I need to wear my tops higher to make my short legs look longer. I actually started to hyperventilate when she hiked up my top to demonstrate to the others. I have spent decades under the delusion that longer tops helped camouflage my out-of-proportion, pear-shaped bottom half. It's going to take some mental readjustment. The class unanimously agreed with her that I looked taller and thinner with a shorter top, or I wouldn't believe it. I also learned that I'm not 5'4", I'm 5'2.5". And that I can't touch my hair - cut or color - between now and my makeover, 2+ months from now! Which means a couple months of bad hair days, with gray sideburns and a skunk stripe down the top of my head. Uh oh.
I might not have snagged a spot on The Biggest Loser, but I certainly feel like a winner! I'm a little nervous, but mostly excited, and very grateful for the amazing opportunity to be worked over by a pro.
P.S. Just this past week, Patricia in my office took me aside and said she noticed that I am walking so much better. Not so wobbly. Forty-two pounds off of my arthritic knees and gimpy foot have made a huge difference! I should be able to get another 40 pounds off by April and sashay down that runway with a spring in my step! ◦
Thursday, January 6, 2011
My NEW GOAL - 100 pounds by April 7th!
Based on my average rate of weight loss these past 12 weeks of 3.33 pounds per week, which included four holidays - Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Years - I am going to commit to giving it everything I've got to lose 60 pounds by April 7th. I will need to stay on track and get moving more, LOTS MORE, but I believe it's possible. It will take a 4.61 pound average weekly loss. Possible, but it will be a real challenge. Success will mean that...
I have been recruited to be in the Women's Council of Realtors spring make-over fashion show! Never, ever, in a million years would I ever have imagined myself agreeing to parade on a runway, as a model. A short, plump, wobbly model. But I agreed to the invitation because I believe it will be good motivation to keep me on course - knowing that I will be on a runway as a model with all eyes on me, on April 7th!
Having lost 40 pounds in the past festive-food-filled 12 week period, I confess to still not exercising like I should. Exercise has always been my nemesis. I lost 40 pounds in spite of NOT MOVING! I did do weight resistance training twice a week in the Optifit fitness center with their awesome staff, for about 8 of those 12 weeks. I did no aerobics. My sore knees and feet make even walking around the block difficult.
So I figure, if I go all out, GET MOVING, focus, and give it all I've got, I just might surprise us all and pull it off.
...I will hit the 100 pound milestone on the day I take to the runway as a fashion model!
I have been recruited to be in the Women's Council of Realtors spring make-over fashion show! Never, ever, in a million years would I ever have imagined myself agreeing to parade on a runway, as a model. A short, plump, wobbly model. But I agreed to the invitation because I believe it will be good motivation to keep me on course - knowing that I will be on a runway as a model with all eyes on me, on April 7th!
Having lost 40 pounds in the past festive-food-filled 12 week period, I confess to still not exercising like I should. Exercise has always been my nemesis. I lost 40 pounds in spite of NOT MOVING! I did do weight resistance training twice a week in the Optifit fitness center with their awesome staff, for about 8 of those 12 weeks. I did no aerobics. My sore knees and feet make even walking around the block difficult.
So I figure, if I go all out, GET MOVING, focus, and give it all I've got, I just might surprise us all and pull it off.
"The greater danger for most of us lies not in setting our aim too high
and falling short, but in setting our aim too low and achieving our mark." Unknown
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and falling short, but in setting our aim too low and achieving our mark." Unknown
The results are in!
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| The beginning, 10/13/2010 |
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| After 12 weeks |
After posting those results on my Facebook wall last night, I got many, many comments of support and encouragement. The most fun was a comment from my 17 year old son:
"dude mom.......your boobs are shrinking. sounds like any girls worst nightmare."
Out of the mouths of babes! I suppose from the perspective of a 17 year old boy that might sound like a girl's worst nightmare. The real nightmare is carrying around all that extra fat! I can always find a padded bra....
I am very pleased with the results. I recognize that had I stayed the course through the holidays, I would have lost more, probably about 8 more pounds or so. It's an interesting mind process, all of this stuff. At the times I gave myself permission to eat what wasn't on my meal plan, I thought the trade off was worth it. I was with my family, in celebratory situations, traveling, out of my routine, away from the gym. Now, I realize it wasn't worth it for the momentary pleasure of eating some yummy stuff. I will have to practice smacking down my drunk monkey when he puts those thoughts into my head. The huge success here is that I still made better food choices, still stayed away from the poison of sweets, and still LOST weight.
I'm looking forward, a little nervously, to the next 12 weeks chapter of my journey, transitioning to real food. I wonder if I can remember the way to the grocery store? No doubt Rick and Derek will enjoy having someone in the house cooking once in a while! ◦
Sunday, January 2, 2011
Drumroll..... The final results of my 12 week Optifit fitness plan are...
DELAYED!
I was traveling to Colorado the evening of my 11 week weigh-in. It's the only one I had missed, and I hated to miss it! I have realized that the weekly accountability, coming face to face with the scale, is really important in keeping me motivated and on track.
Last Wednesday, the 29th, was the scheduled final 12 week weigh-in for Kerri and me. But the heavy snow storm that blew in caused the Optifit folks to cancel the evening's scheduled appointments and support group meeting.
So this coming Wednesday we will officially have our last weigh-in of our 12 week journey, on week 13! It will have been THREE WEEKS since I was on the scale after week 10. Gulp. Three weeks that I have been traveling, busy, out of my routine and veering off track! I haven't been in the gym for the past two weeks. I have eaten off the plan!
On a positive note, I have NOT eaten any sweets. None, nada. And let me tell you, sweets were all around me! Nor did I eat any hot out of the oven home made rolls dripping with butter, like everyone around me was eating. But, I ate. And the problem with that is one thing leads to another, and I ate more. And again. But no sugary sweets, pastries, candies, pies, cakes or my mother's famous fudge - which has been singing to me from my kitchen for almost a week now. No sugar, not one bite. In spite of my lack of perfection, I can say I have been perfect in that!
So this is my confession. And my worry for my weigh-in on Wednesday. Realistically, I probably stopped losing weight a couple weeks ago. Maybe I am up a little, maybe not.
It's a new year, a new start! I'm not sure what my plan will be from here on out, now that we have finished our 12 week Optifit rotation. Kerri and I will have it figured out soon, we're determined to keep going until we are half the women we were in 2010! ◦
I was traveling to Colorado the evening of my 11 week weigh-in. It's the only one I had missed, and I hated to miss it! I have realized that the weekly accountability, coming face to face with the scale, is really important in keeping me motivated and on track.
Last Wednesday, the 29th, was the scheduled final 12 week weigh-in for Kerri and me. But the heavy snow storm that blew in caused the Optifit folks to cancel the evening's scheduled appointments and support group meeting.
So this coming Wednesday we will officially have our last weigh-in of our 12 week journey, on week 13! It will have been THREE WEEKS since I was on the scale after week 10. Gulp. Three weeks that I have been traveling, busy, out of my routine and veering off track! I haven't been in the gym for the past two weeks. I have eaten off the plan!
On a positive note, I have NOT eaten any sweets. None, nada. And let me tell you, sweets were all around me! Nor did I eat any hot out of the oven home made rolls dripping with butter, like everyone around me was eating. But, I ate. And the problem with that is one thing leads to another, and I ate more. And again. But no sugary sweets, pastries, candies, pies, cakes or my mother's famous fudge - which has been singing to me from my kitchen for almost a week now. No sugar, not one bite. In spite of my lack of perfection, I can say I have been perfect in that!
So this is my confession. And my worry for my weigh-in on Wednesday. Realistically, I probably stopped losing weight a couple weeks ago. Maybe I am up a little, maybe not.
It's a new year, a new start! I'm not sure what my plan will be from here on out, now that we have finished our 12 week Optifit rotation. Kerri and I will have it figured out soon, we're determined to keep going until we are half the women we were in 2010! ◦
Thursday, December 30, 2010
A close encounter of the AFFIRMATIVE kind!
By the time Kristen and I got our feet in jetted tubs of warm water, I looked and felt like a train wreck. Circles under my puffy, cry baby eyes, mascara smeared, hair I should have washed this morning but didn't have time to do. There were several other people in the busy salon. One woman looked vaguely familiar, but I couldn't place her. Kristen and I read our magazines as the chairs massaged our backs and we received the DELUXE pedicure. Heavenly leg massages with herbs, mineral scrubs, baggies of hot wax enveloping our feet... Just what the doctor ordered!
Then, unexpectedly, the vaguely familiar woman approached me. I lowered my magazine, she leaned toward me and with her hand on my knee said,
"You are a beautiful, BEAUTIFUL woman!"
Before I had a chance to respond, she was gone. Kristen stared at me and I stared at the woman making her exit. What in the world?
Let me just say that I do believe that I am a beautiful woman. Not movie star beautiful, but without too much effort I can put myself together attractively. I'm blessed with good genetics (with the exception of the pesky fat gene) and almost no wrinkles in my 54 year old face. But today, this afternoon, in my frazzled and tear stained state, I definitely did not have the appearance of a "beautiful, BEAUTIFUL" woman! Certainly not to the extent that a stranger would make a point to come over and tell me how beautiful I am. This I know FOR SURE!
So what was that all about? I think that the woman knows who I am. Perhaps she's a friend of Kerri's and has followed our blogs and Facebook postings. Perhaps she's reading this now! I think she is aware of the journey Kerri and I are on, to overcome once and for all our battle with the bulge.
I have had numerous people comment to me how I have inspired them. Random people who I am not particularly close to. Out of the blue they will engage me in conversation about Optifit, dieting, health and fitness. I have come to realize that there are many, many people out there watching me. And being inspired by me. It is a humbling and somewhat overwhelming realization, not unlike the emotional part of dealing with my distressed real estate clients. People are depending on me! What I'm doing is making a difference in people's lives!
So to the woman who reminded me today that I am a beautiful, BEAUTIFUL woman, thank you! Your kindness has helped strengthen my resolve to carry on and win the good fight. For me, for Kerri, for my clients, and for all the people that I am not even aware of who are gaining strength and motivation by following my story.
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Wednesday, December 29, 2010
Grandma Janna's Optifit Shakes are umm, umm GOOD!
This month saw me take TWO trips to Colorado. The first one was a quick few days early in the month for the sole purpose of making gingerbread houses with my darling granddaughters, Rileigh and Khloe. Then, my husband and son accompanied me for a Christmas visit.
Both times, I brought along my Magic Bullet blender and Optifit food. I like to blend up my nutritionally engineered shakes in the blender with a few ice cubes. They really are delicious! The blender is LOUD, so it was impossible to be covert when mixing up a shake. The little girls would always come running when they heard the sound of Grandma's blender, to help me drink my shake. Looking through some Christmas pictures this morning, I had to smile when I saw this one. Two year old Khloe helping Grandma Janna with her shake. ENTHUSIASTICALLY helping, I should say!
And here you see a glimpse of my Big Why. WHY I am doing this. I want to be around for a long, long time, fit and healthy and able to enjoy these beautiful little girls as they grow up. It's the best, and most fun, motivation there is! ◦
Bye Bye 35 and GOOD RIDDANCE!
As the pounds have been coming off since I began my Optifit journey in October, I have thought a lot about how dumb it was to regain that weight. How all of this hard work I was doing now hadn't even got me back to where I was before I put that weight back on.
At my 10 week weigh-in, the fancy scale spit out my little paper announcing that I had lost a total of 37 pounds! HOORAY! That darn 35 pounds was FINALLY gone and I am now making real progress! What an exhilarating feeling that was! It was a good moment.
On a side note, I think the science of it all is fascinating. When I had lost 21 pounds, and was a bit discouraged that I wasn't losing more, faster, I had a visit with Kristi Flicker, our registered dietitian. Kristi whipped out her calculator and did the math. Based on my metabolic testing when I began, I needed X number of calories each day to exist. I was eating Y number of calories per day. With a pound of fat being equal to 3,500 calories, I should be losing an average of about 3.5 pounds per week. Well, some weeks I would lose 2, some 1, then 5.... But at week ten I had lost 37 pounds, proving that Kristi really does know her stuff!
I still have a loooooooooooong way to go. But I am finding so many moments along my journey that give me inspiration and motivation to keep on keepin' on. Life is good, and I am not going to settle for being a big marshmallow any longer! ◦
Tuesday, December 28, 2010
A pivitol moment at the mall
Enjoying having our college daughter home for just a few days, my husband and I went with her to the mall in Spokane in search of a new coat. We got to a department store, and all went in separate directions in search of post-Christmas bargains. I looked for the Queen Size women's department and couldn't find one. Not all stores have Queen departments, or Plus Sizes, or whatever name they give the clothes that fit LARGE women. I decided to take a look through the normal-people-sized clothes. I saw four tops that I liked and decided to throw caution to the wind and try them on in a normal-person-size extra large. The first one fit perfectly, but it looked too much like an old lady shirt. The second one was cute, fit pretty good except was too tight on my arms. I almost got it anyway, knowing my arms are slowly shrinking, but decided against it. The third one I couldn't squeeze my arms into at all, it wasn't a knit like the others. The fourth one fit like a charm, I loved it and I bought it.
Tomorrow, I will wear the first thing I have bought in DECADES in the regular ladies department at the store! Yes, it's a knit. Yes, it's a size XL. But yes, it is NOT from the Queen Sized department! I'm making progress, I see light at the end of the tunnel, and I LIKE it! ◦
Tomorrow, I will wear the first thing I have bought in DECADES in the regular ladies department at the store! Yes, it's a knit. Yes, it's a size XL. But yes, it is NOT from the Queen Sized department! I'm making progress, I see light at the end of the tunnel, and I LIKE it! ◦
It was an ENORMOUSLY significant event!
I'd like to share an experience I had on Christmas eve that took me by surprise. We were in Colorado, at my daughter-in-law's sister's house. My two little granddaughters were joined by their five small cousins, and the seven kiddos were surprised by a visit from Santa! Santa called up each of the kids and presented them with a gift bag containing their Christmas Jammies. What fun! Then he called up Kristen, my almost 21 year old daughter. That was a surprise, she jumped on Santa's lap, and he presented her with some jammies, too. He called up my daughter-in-law Trinity, and presented her with jammies to match Kristen's. Next, to my horror, he called out my name, and handed me some jammies to match Kristen's and Trinity's.
I say to my horror because never, ever, have I received a gift of clothing of any kind, that wasn't too small. Whether a sweater, bathrobe, jacket, it didn't matter. I would open it, be urged by the giver to try it on, and it would be too small. Every time, as long as I can remember. I am hard to fit, short and round and bigger than people think I am. Every gift of clothing would leave me embarrassed and humiliated. EVERY TIME!
I DREAD gifts of clothing like nothing else!
I thanked Santa and fretted about those pajamas the rest of the evening. I was almost sick to my stomach dreading the moment when everyone would urge me to go put them on, and I would be spilling out of them. Seriously, it ruined my evening. When we arrived home, everyone put on their Christmas jammies. Something made me decide to go ahead and try them on. And do you know what, they FIT! I can't explain the joy I felt that night and Christmas day, to be wearing matching jammies with my girls. To be doing something a NORMAL person could do!
It was a pivotal moment in my life. Why have I settled for living like I have been? It's ridiculous! I will keep moving forward, stay the course and never give up! I'm looking forward to the new year, getting back on track, back on schedule, back into a controlled setting. Stay tuned, it's only going to get better and better! ◦
Thursday, December 16, 2010
What I like about my body - what do YOU like about your body?
The gym is NOT my favorite place to be. Not fun. I am seriously out of shape.
SERIOUSLY! As in a big marshmallow.
SERIOUSLY! As in a big marshmallow.
My feet have issues, my knees have issues, it hurts. I whine. I moan and groan. I complain as I strain. I would always find myself apologizing to my trainer, either Chad, Cate or Kristi, for being such a whiny baby. Last week after one such episode Cate said to me that it was ok, she just didn't like to hear me say that I can't do something. That stopped me in my tracks, I asked her if I really had said that. Said those words, "I can't." She assured me that I had, and it upset me. I am all about positive mindset and releasing negative energy. If you haven't, you should read my former post about the importance of positive affirmations.
After that I made the decision to only think and say positive things in the gym. No more whining and complaining. My next appointment with Cate, as she put me through the ringer, I said only positive things through my clenched teeth. I would moan and groan only happy comments. "I LOVE IT!" "This feels so GOOD!" "I'm getting STRONGER."
She giggled, I sweated and giggled. We even laughed out loud a few times. "I'm building LEAN MUSCLE!" "I'm a lean, mean fat burning machine!"
I definitely had more fun that day. Cate said she remembered a class in college where they had to write out positive affirmations, and thought that perhaps that would be something good to have in the gym.
As I was finishing up on the last machine, she asked me to tell her what I like about my body. That came out of left field and took me by surprise. Perhaps she was testing my determination to be only positive. I thought for a moment and came back with "I have thin ankles." Then, "I have a waist." It may be large, but I do have a waist.... "I have a pretty face." I thought of one more, but I'll leave that up to your imagination, it had to do with the "girls."
Cate never really commented one way or another, but it got me thinking about what I like about my body. The biggie: I have a magnificently healthy body, all things considered, which I have done nothing to deserve. I have abused my body by subjecting it to a condition of morbid obesity my entire adult life. My knees are bad and my feet hurt, but can you blame them? However, at my blood test prior to beginning the Optifit program in mid-October, the only red flag was low vitamin D. Cholesterol, glucose, everything else - GOOD! That is truly amazing considering my body composition was more than 50% fat! I'm taking a 4000 IU Vitamin D supplement daily, and feeling very blessed.
I continue to smack down my drunk monkey and the negative thoughts he tries to get me to listen to. It's been fun thinking about what I like about my body. You should try it.
What do you like about YOUR body?
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Wednesday, December 8, 2010
My husband, the jerk?
We decided to go see Unstoppable, the runaway train movie. As it got close to time to head for the theater, I verbalized my unease about my ability to go enjoy a movie in the theater without eating hot, buttered, movie theater popcorn. That has always been part of the experience for me. He didn't acknowledge my comment, and off we went.
No sooner than we had cleared the ticket counter, he headed for the concession stand and ordered a large buttered popcorn! I stared at him in disbelief, and I think my jaw was even gaping open. I didn't say a word, he saw me looking at him incredulously and said, "What? I'm hungry."
I didn't say a word. In the couple of minutes it took for them to fill his order, take his money, make his change and send him on his way, my mind was racing.
My first thought was something like "What an insensitive jerk!" I felt hurt because he wasn't supporting me by not eating popcorn in front of me knowing I love it and wouldn't be able to eat some, too. Seriously, what a jerk!
But then my mind went to thinking that what I choose to eat or not to eat should have nothing to do with whatever anyone else around me is eating. It's my choice, and if he wants some popcorn, who am I to be so weak and whiny that I demand he abstain because I have to? It's not his fault he's healthy and fit and can eat like a horse and stay slim and trim!
Finally, I closed my gaping jaw and realized that I am blessed indeed to have a loving and devoted husband of 36.5 years who has always supported me in anything I chose to do. This would include my abstinence from cooking for him for the past couple months. Including that evening, when he didn't have dinner and decided to eat some popcorn while he watched the movie. Yes, in front of me when I couldn't enjoy some too. Well, I could have, but I chose not to.
He has never said one complaining word about my extended vacation from cooking. I decided I wouldn't say one complaining word to him, either. We watched the movie as he munched that popcorn with it's heavenly aroma right in my ear. Oh, how I wanted some. DANG! But I actually did enjoy the movie minus the popcorn and scored another victory. Janna 1, Popcorn 0.
And then, I went on to a 4.5 pound weight loss that week, which is SO much better than hot buttered movie theater popcorn EVER was! ◦
Tuesday, December 7, 2010
Goodbye FAT CLOTHES! Well, kind of....
Having lost 31 pounds, I went shopping in my closet for clothes I haven't been able to wear for a while, and in some cases, years! I scored big time in my closet, and pulled out of a box that had moved with me from Colorado in 2008, THREE pair of brand new jeans I had bought on sale when I couldn't quite fit into them. I had planned to get a few pounds off at the time, years ago. I didn't, and I totally forgot about them. I tried them on, and they fit! No such luck with dress slacks.
I tried on lots of stuff, and decided to purge my closet and my life of my FAT clothes. Things that have become baggy and saggy. Like all my decent slacks for work. Lots of tops. A skirt and a jacket. Goodbye fat clothes. I ended up with 75 items in my purge pile, including the baggy outfit I wore the day before and all my fat summer clothes that will be miles too big next summer. I bagged them up and immediately drove them to the thrift store, and didn't look back.
Having said that, with STILL more than 100 pounds to lose, every piece of clothing remaining in my closet can appropriately be categorized as fat clothes, but they aren't AS fat! And I'm NEVER going back!
The past couple years, I have seldom worn jeans. Something about looking like the broad side of a barn! (Which I still do, just a bit less broad...) But those of you who cross my path in the next little while will notice me in jeans a lot.
And now you know the rest of the story!
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Monday, December 6, 2010
It was a GOOD weigh in! And I rejoiced!
There must have been SOME explanation besides
simply having dropped 5.5 pounds of fat that week.
simply having dropped 5.5 pounds of fat that week.
The following week, Thanksgiving week, I actually ate some real food off my meal plan, and other crimes, which I also confessed in an earlier post. When I showed up to weigh in last Wednesday, I was secretly praying that my weight wouldn't be UP, that I would have at least stayed the same. I was dumbfounded to see the fancy scale spit out a little paper that said I had lost 4.4 pounds! Yes, indeed, I had lost 10 whole pounds of fat, not muscle or anything else, in two weeks. And a total of 31 pounds since I began.
I hugged everyone I could get my arms around, and rejoiced! I had Kristi Flicker, the beautiful, smart and perky Optifit Dietitian, hold up her model of 5 pounds of gross fat, as well as her model of 5 pounds of lean muscle.
It is amazing to me to think that in 7 weeks I have lost
more than SIX of those disgusting 5 pound globs of fat!
more than SIX of those disgusting 5 pound globs of fat!
I am thrilled! And I am so grateful for this amazing opportunity to jump start my journey to good health and fitness. THANK YOU, OPTIFIT! ◦
Monday, November 29, 2010
FORK FOOD, Hooray!
Last Wednesday, I weighed in with a 5.5 pound weight loss! Holy smokes! Talk about motivational! It was Thanksgiving eve, and helped to fortify me against the over indulgence of bounteous feasts of traditional culinary delights! In fact, I didn't cook, at all. My guys, having cancelled their ski day due to bitter cold, went to our neighbor's to feast while I stayed happily home and watched movies in my Snuggie by the fireside. The snow was softly falling, and did I mention I weighed 5.5 pounds LESS than I weighed the Thursday before? Did I mention that I was happy, content and didn't care that I wasn't feasting?
What would cause a 5.5 pound weight loss that week? What had I done differently? The only significant difference I can identify is the introduction of FORK FOOD! After 6 weeks of meals with no silverware required, the week leading up to my weigh-in included the introduction of some hot entrees!
Disclaimer - my hot entree fork food still comes out of little paper packets. They are reconstituted with minuscule amounts of water. The "eggs" in the photo are reconstituted with 3 ounces water. They are hot, and not exactly delicious, but they are REAL FOOD, kind of.
At my 5 week evaluation, I was surprised to find that I could start ordering fork food as part of my meal plan. That scared the bejeebers out of me for some irrational reason. Thinking back, it was because I felt like I had conquered food, the power it had over me, I was happily sipping my shakes and eating my two nutritionally designed meal replacement bars each day. I was in control, in the groove! Why change things up now and risk falling off the wagon? I declined to add fork food to my menu that week. I was scared of it.
The next Wednesday, after hearing my sister Kerri comment about how nice it was to have something hot to eat, I took the plunge and ordered some fork food. Beefsteak Pasta, and Cheesy Eggs. I'll bet money that there is no steak, or beef in any other form in that pasta, although I did identify about 5 elbows of what looks like real macaroni! I am pretty sure there's no cheese in the eggs, in fact, not sure there's eggs in the eggs. Nevertheless, I have thoroughly enjoyed them both, although the eggs do require a dollop of salsa to bring them up to enjoyable status.
What could fork food have to do with my 5.5 pound big number week? I can't help wonder if it's because the nutritionally engineered meal replacement bars that the fork food replaced are actually higher in calories, and higher in carbs. That's my guess.
I am not looking forward to this week's weigh in. Although I successfully dodged Thanksgiving dinner, on Saturday I decided to eat a slice of turkey, some stuffing and spiced apples. It was good, and I enjoyed it, but in hindsight I wish I hadn't. I don't drink much pop at all, but over the 4 day holiday I consumed an entire 2 litre bottle of diet A&W root beer! As well as a couple batches of my guilty pleasure - diet jello! I also realized that I wasn't drinking water like I need to do. I think I went a couple days without drinking ANY water. Oh, and I confess to also eating a dill pickle! And, I wasn't doing my affirmations and keeping track of my meal schedule and what I was eating, and when. But I know I didn't overeat (or I would be running short of my little packets of food. So all in all, I am pleased with my holiday weekend.
I need to regroup and get back in the saddle, back in control of my food, schedule, water and mindset. My brief and minor holiday diversion from my strict program and restricted carbs would have knocked the scientific mechanics of my fat burning machine out of whack for a few of days. And such is life. At least I didn't decide to take a holiday and simply eat with wild abandon, which a few times my drunk monkey suggested I do. I may have lost a tiny bit of momentum, but I didn't lose any ground.
Marching onward, fork in hand. And now, I'm off to fill my water jug.... ◦
Monday, November 22, 2010
"Why do you think that was?"
The medical supervision part of my medically supervised weight loss journey is being provided by Dr. Thomas Neil. Dr. Neil himself went through the Optifit program a few years ago and lost 50 pounds or so. I like Dr. Neil! He also has a family practice and has now become the Scharf family's official primary care physician. This picture is from our first meeting. Those of you who know my sister Kerri, who is on a parallel journey with me to health and fitness, know that she is never without a camera. Even our first Optifit visit was a photo opportunity!
Last week, at our 6 week evaluation, everyone including Dr. Neil, was congratulating me on the great accomplishment of having lost 21 pounds. I must have seemed less than overjoyed because everyone was also telling me that I needed to let myself be really proud of that accomplishment. Which I was, but with SO MUCH weight to lose, 21 pounds is just a drop in the bucket.
Dr. Neil, probing a little, asked why I wasn't more excited with my 21 pound loss. He actually wanted a real answer. Imagine that! I told him that I have lost 21 pounds many times before. I can't really see any difference in how I look. He was kind of stubborn and seemed to want a REAL answer to his question! Hmmm. So I told him of my experience last year.
In January 2009 I was invited to join in at a neighboring real estate office when they launched a weight loss challenge. We each paid $35 into the prize kitty, and would meet weekly for a lunchtime weigh-in and meeting. Over the course of that 3 month challenge, I was the weekly biggest loser once, my team mate was the final biggest loser and as a member of the winning team I got a land fall cash price of $130! I lost a total of 25 pounds. Since then, in the past year and a half, I regained all the weight I lost and a BONUS ten more pounds! So you see, until I lose 35 pounds, I'm not even back to where I was last year before I gained back the weight I lost.
Why do you think that was?
Another question from the good doctor! And it stopped me in my tracks. Again, he wanted an answer. Why do I think that was. Why..... Why did I work so hard to get it off and then let it creep back on? That's a REALLY GOOD QUESTION. My reply, the simple, obvious and superficial answer, was this - Because I resumed eating with abandon.
Dr. Neil sort of chuckled at that and encouraged me to give some thought to the why. That question has been on mind ever since, and I don't know the answer yet. WHY did I resume eating with abandon? WHY would an intelligent woman let that happen? WHY? It is so absolutely ridiculous!
As I have given it some thought this past week, I don't know the answer, but I do realize one thing. An epiphany of sorts. The weekly weigh-ins and accountability WORKS to keep me on track. It's the common denominator in my successful periods of weight loss. I hadn't realized this before.
I hadn't seen this picture of Dr. Neil and me at our first meeting since Kerri emailed it to me more than 6 weeks ago. I have to say, for the first time I CAN see a difference in how I look now from how I looked then. So now, I have to admit, I am a little more excited with my 21 pound accomplishment! Just a little... ◦
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